When confronted with a day trip to a museum, Homer on one occasion observed: “Good things don’t end with ‘eum’, they end with ‘mania’ or ‘teria’.”

This is a fun-lovin’ guy who would sell his soul for an extra donut, free beer, or anything a catchy advertising slogan suggests to him. He might not always be able to remember the name of “the baby”, but he’s a regular guy who believes in good old-fashioned family entertainment, so long as there’s a bar at the end of it. As a patriot of his country, he likes to go native on his travels, so banqueting like a king at the Joust festival would be right up his street. For dads like Homer, holidays are a chance to have fun like a kid again. As he once told Marge: “I used to rock’n’ roll all night and party every day, then it was every other day, now I’m lucky if I can find half an hour a week to get funky. I’ve gotta get out of this rut, and back into the groove!”

CADBURY WORLD

Travel round in a “Beanmobile” and discover how rivers of the brown stuff turn into chocolate bars. Linden Road, Bournville, Birmingham (www.cadbury world.co.uk 0845 4503599), opening times vary, £13, children £9.95, under4s free

GREENE KING BREWERY TOUR

For Homer, any brewery tour is A Good Thing, but this one, set in Suffolk, adds colour to the fine tradition of British brewing. And yes, they have a tasting room. For similar tours in other parts of the country visit www.visitabrewery.co.uk. Westgate Brewery, Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk (www.greeneking.co.uk 01284 714297), Mon-Sat 10am-5pm (tour times vary), £8, evening tours £10

JOUST MEDIEVAL FESTIVAL

Lord it up and banquet like a king, or just enjoy castle seige reenactments and the sweet singing of the Medieval Babes. Berkeley Castle, Gloucs (www.joust.info 020-7281 7647), Jul 21-22 & 28-29, £10, children £4, under4s free

MADAME TUSSAUDS

Endless fun getting close to the stars at this waxwork gallery of the famous and infamous. After all, guys like Homer like to keep in touch with culture: “I saw this movie about a bus that had to speed around a city, keeping its speed over 50, and if its speed dropped, it would explode! I think it was called . . . ‘The Bus That Couldn’t Slow Down’.” Marylebone Road, London NW1 (www.madame-tussauds. co.uk 0870 9990046), Mon-Sun 9am-6pm, prices vary

NATIONAL SPACE CENTRE

After his adventures in Deep Space Homer, Homer and other dads are bound to be lured by the chance to show off their knowledge to their offspring at this visitor centre. Exploration Drive, Leicester (www.spacecentre.co.uk 0116-261 0261), Mon-Sun 10am-5pm, £11, children £9