Watch Jarvis Cocker talk about life, love and Star Trek in our new online show, Live at the Morpeth

The word “arts” should be banned. Really, it's bad for you. We've all had some memorable debates about movies, bands, books and plays, but as soon as the word “arts” is mentioned people change. They morph into arts-speak zombies. First to go is their sense of humour, which is replaced by pomposity. Then the capacity to listen deserts them. Next comes the verbal tic whereby they are limited to being able to use only arcane words and phrases. Involuntary lifting of the nose and drooping of the eyelids quickly follows. The transformation is completed when all sense of critical judgment is lost; their once liberal, intelligent, open-minded disposition is replaced by the personality of P.W. Botha.

And nobody is immune. I spent two bizarre hours last week sitting on a panel with the great and the good from television talking about whether or not there were enough arts programmes on TV. A boring topic at the best of times became utterly turgid as a dispute developed over what constituted an arts programme. One of my fellow panellists tried to argue that a documentary by Peter Ackroyd about the River Thames was an arts programme, but a Paul Merton documentary about India wasn't. Eh? Seeing as both programmes were travelogues, the only point of difference was the presenter. I assume my co-panellist felt that Ackroyd “belonged” to the arts and Merton didn't. Why? Because Merton makes people laugh? For my money comedy is one of the most significant of all the art forms: it requires brilliant writing, exceptional performing talent and an uncanny understanding of life.

Which is why, when on Friday Times Online launches its brand new internet chat show Culturecritic Live at the Morpeth, filmed at the Morpeth Arms in London, the word “arts” will be banned, but comedians won't. And I'll make personally sure of that - I'm the host. We'll have an eclectic mix of guests; some are household names, such as Dawn French and Jarvis Cocker, others less well known, such as the playwright Enda Walsh and choreographer Matthew Bourne. But they all have one important thing in common: their exceptional artistic talent. The purpose of the show is to gain a first-person insight into their careers, their influences and their latest projects. So that over the six-week series we create a catalogue of in-depth interviews as well as an overview of what's hot at the moment.

We're not trying to make a TV programme - you could make a thousand episodes of Culturecritic Live at the Morpeth for the price of one Friday Night with Jonathan Ross - we're making a vodcast. That means TV's fancy production techniques and rehearsed scripts make way for real conversations and real life. If there's a cock-up, it stays in.

The show's title is pretty straightforward too. The Culturecritic bit of the name comes from a new website that I've put together with some friends (culturecritic.co.uk aggregates the newspaper and online reviews of the latest CDs, films, plays, books, art, etc. and gives them a score) and the Morpeth Arms is a pub in Pimlico, southwest London, famous for its mixed clientele of artists, locals and politicians.

We're filming the show in the stunning first-floor bar room that overlooks the Thames. It's a great space, but only has the capacity to fit in a maximum of 40 people. As readers of The Times or visitors to culturecritic.co.uk, you have the exclusive chance to take part in the show. There is a charge, but it's not money. The price of entry is simply a really good question for our guest. Those who submit the best questions can come on the show. And I do mean “on” the show, so prepare to take part. Whether that's asking your question, joining the guest and me at our table, or learning to sing the blues with Seasick Steve. The internet is an interactive medium and Culturecritic Live at the Morpeth is an interactive show.

Being on the net also means that everybody can contribute, whether by suggesting guests to invite or posting comments having seen it. If you like it, tell us. If you hate it, tell us. We don't mind either way; we just want the discussion to live on. The most interesting aspect of the whole Russell Brand/Jonathan Ross thing was the public's reaction. The tens of thousands of comments were reported as being complaints, but that is to oversimplify what people were actually doing. They were expressing a point of view, an informed opinion, having listened to the broadcast. They were being culture critics.

And that plurality of criticism is important. Toby Young recently quoted James Surowiecki, a financial journalist on The New Yorker. Surowiecki said that it is common in business schools for professors to play the old, guess-how-many-sweets-are-in-the-jar game. When individual students guess the number of sweets, they are miles out. But when all the students' guesses are aggregated, they are correct to within 3 per cent. The same applies to criticism. Which is why we are making Culturecritic Live at the Morpeth for the web and starting culturecritic.co.uk. And if we ever slip into arts-speak, you know what to do.

Email your questions to arts@thetimes.co.uk I Future guests include Grayson Perry, Dawn French, Matthew Bourne, Enda Walsh and Seasick Steve

Upstairs at the Morpeth is filmed in front of a live audience. Win your chance to put your question by emailing arts@thetimes.co.uk.There is only room for forty people and the only way to win a place is simply a really good question. If you are chosen you will be notified of the time and location of the event