Your scariest song?
D: Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice. It’s genuinely chilling.
G: I agree. How could someone do that to the riff from Under Pressure? I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Freddie Mercury died just one year after Ice Ice Baby was released.

Name an album that has a special meaning for you
G: Highway to Hell by AC/DC. Whenever people claim that Australia is culturally dead, I tell them to listen to the ’DC. Beating Around the Bush was the song that was playing when my wife Pam and I first consummated our relationship. And, ironically, Caught With Your Pants Down was the song that was playing when I told Pam of a brief indiscretion I’d had with a goth at a horror convention. And, yes, she did break my balls. Heh, heh, heh . . .
D: To All the Girls I’ve Loved Before. I got drunk to that song when the Child Support Agency first tracked me down.

What’s your favourite song?
G: Pan’s Demonium (the title track from my prog-rock collaboration with Rik Bedford).
D: I love the track I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) by the Proclaimers. I’m especially fond of the lyric “When I’m working, yes I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man that’s working hard for you. And when the money, comes in for the work I do, I’ll pass almost every penny on to you.” Almost every penny. It’s both romantic and fiscally prudent.

What’s your favourite floorfiller?
G: I have no idea what that means. I presume it’s drug- related. I used to smoke pot and listen to Close to the Edge by Yes, but I now realise that life’s too short.
D: I do like Yazz’s The Only Way is Up. Though I suppose it’s fair to say that didn’t turn out to be the case for her. Certainly charts-wise. Maybe she’s reached a higher plane in her personal life. I don’t feel able to judge.

What’s your guilty pleasure?
D: I think all pleasure should be guilt-free.
G: I sometimes write while listening to the sounds of slaughtered livestock. I feel the occasional twinge about that. But what’s on the page is always so vital I view it as being in the same category as scientists doing animal research. We’re both working to save mankind.

What music would you have played at your funeral?
G: I don’t plan on dying. But if I do, either Bat Out of Hell by Meat Loaf or the audio book of me reading Slicer IV: The Blade is Back.
D: I’m not sure what I’d have played at my funeral, but they played The Boys are Back in Town by Thin Lizzy at my mother’s. She had a lot of suitors.

© Matthew Holness and Richard Ayoade 2006. Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace is out to buy on DVD