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Least ecstatic reaction of the year
“Oh, Christ. You can’t go on getting excited every year about this. I’ve won all the prizes in Europe, every bloody one.”
Doris Lessing’s response on being told she had won the Nobel prize for literature
Best bid to reduce own sales
“When people pick up a book they may want something happy that will cheer them up. In that case they shouldn’t really pick up my book. It’s the intellectual equivalent of a Hollywood weepie.”
Anne Enright discussing her Man Booker-winning The Gathering, Today programme
Reassuring declaration of the year
“I don’t want to strip-search you, Yasmin, or do anything that would even momentarily surprise your dignity, or that of any eirenic Muslim.”
From Martin Amis’s letter to Yasmin Alibhai-Brown defending his “thought experiment” (also criticised by Terry Eagleton and Ronan Bennett) suggesting anti-Muslim measures
Most patronising rejection letter
“It seems like a really original and interesting read.”
Penguin turns down chapters from Pride and Prejudice, submitted by David Lassman

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Robin of Cambridge is quite correct,I spelt Massingberd incorrectly.I was merely commenting on what a delightful man he was.I only knew him on the cricket pitch many years ago.
Just a point,it is didn't not did'nt!!
EDWARD SYNGE, TISBURY, UK
I would imagine, having just read Hugh Massingberd's obituary, that his cricket isn't up to much right now
Warwick Pearmund, Tokyo,
"Ship me somewheres east of Suez
Where the best is like the worst
Where there ain't no Ten Commandments
And a man can raise a thirst..."
And with any luck get the apostrophe right. Us dyslexics have got to stick together.
Andrew Milner, Yokohama, Japan
Dear Edward
Why would ANYBODY be interested that you knew Massingberd played cricket, still less that you did'nt know how to spell his name?
Robin, Cambridge, UK
Massingbird gets it right as usual,what a joy he is.(Incidently ,hows your cricket?)
EDWARD SYNGE, TISBURY, uk