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A sign on some public toilets in a lay-by on the A40 reads: “These facilities are for everyone. Is your behaviour appropriate?” It made me laugh, but it took me years to understand it. If you are similarly mystified, you could do no better than to read Warwick Collins’s Gents.
Collins is a poet, novelist and a bestseller in France and Germany. His style is marked by a European sensibility. Gents is spare, quirky, funny and profound.
Ezekiel Stanislaus Murphy – “Ez” – comes from Kingston, Jamaica. When he starts a new job in London, he is drawn into a brotherly trio with his boss, Josiah Reynolds, and Jason, a Rastafarian with two wives and a “chameleon” eye. Ez, Jason and Mr Reynolds work in a gents’ lavatory. But this is no tale of exploitation, drudgery or prejudice. Their everyday tasks may be menial, but they work with pride and efficiency. They brew a good cup of tea. Their wives – all four – love them. They take pride in their appearance and their home life. They are respected in their communities and assiduous in their religious practice.
Their one problem is with the “reptiles” – so called because, as Jason explains, they are “cold . . . cold inside . . . Don’ have no emotions . . . Come. Afterward go”. These are men who frequent the establishment to make it a convenience in more than the usual sense, as two, three – or, on one occasion, five – share a cubicle. Jason diagnoses this as a corruption specific to “Whitey” until he confronts a black man exiting second from a lavatory stall.
When their council supervisor instructs them to clamp down, all three are willing. But when the turnstile takings plummet, they find that the Gents is threatened with closure and the end of the jobs that they love.
The resolution is moving, generous, and surprising. It may be only ten years since it was first published, but Gents is a classic moral fable about understanding and respect.
Gents by Warwick Collins
The Friday Project, £6.99
Buy the book here for the offer price of £6.59 inc p&p

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