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The Prophet Murders by Mehmet Murat Somer
Serpent's Tail, £7.99 Buy
the book here
The Good Thief's Guide to Amsterdam by Chris Ewan
Pocket Books, £6.99 Buy
the book here
THRILLER WITH a Muslim hero is a bit of a novelty in Britain. Less so in Turkey. But even there Mehmet Murat Somer's unnamed hero is a one-off: a gay transvestite nightclub owner and computer whiz who refers to himself in the feminine. A self-confessed “creature of the night”, “she” gets a cruel awakening in a newspaper headline declaring “Transvestite burned to death”, referring to a “girl” known as Ceren, actually a young man called Ibrahim, in an apparent domestic accident.
But when it is followed by the drowning of the pretty pale-skinned Gül and an Iranian transvestite refugee whose body is found in a cave, a worrying trend emerges. All the more worrying when their male names are found to be Yusuf and Mahommet.
Someone is murdering transvestites whose real names are those of the prophets. A helpful list of names at the front of the book gives a helpful translation aid across the Judaeo-Christian-Islamic pantheon, Yusuf being Joseph, Ibrahim being Abraham, Musa being Moses etc, including Isa for Jesus (it would have been better if the glossary of everyday Turkish terms had been alongside rather than at the end).
This is heady ground for a camp comedic thriller, especially when it is littered with references to rampant homosexual practice. As such it is a healthy and well-timed reminder that our stereotypes can be well wide of the mark, as well as a chilly amusing high-adrenalin romp through what seems at times like an alternative universe.
Chris Ewan's universe is closer to home and a lot more familiar, though equally louche: the red-light district and cannabis-selling “coffee shops” of Amsterdam. His alternative hero is an engaging hack novelist called Charlie Howard, who supplements his unsatisfying income, as you do, with a bit of casual thieving. Hired by an American to pinch the two missing members of an alabaster “hear-no-evil, see-no-evil, speak-no-evil” three-monkey set, he winds up in trouble when his employer is murdered and the police suspect Charlie.
The monkeys are apparently worthless in themselves until he finds out the secret that it takes all three to unlock, which involves missing diamonds, a conspiracy gone wrong and a beautiful girl bent on vengeance.
Like the Turkish tale, this is told in the first person and benefits hugely from it, at least until the end, where Charlie's set-piece Poirot-esque exposé before the suspects is a bit too pat, and a lot too wordy.
The book's cheapskate cover design - the monkeys don't even do their job - may put punters off, which would be a shame. With a bit of tweaking Howard has the potential to be an amoral Simon Templar.
Proof all round that the world is more amusing when saints and sinners blur.

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