GOING UP

British film studio in profit shock

Pinewood Shepperton posted a pretax profit of £7.2m for 2006 compared to £600,000 in 2005, thanks largely to James Bond and Gordon Brown's new tax credit rules.

Maradona madness

There are two films about the footballer out in the next few months – La Mano de Dios, directed by Marco Risi and another biopic from Emir Kurustica. Give the man a big hand!

Hollywood honesty

Mark Wahlberg confesses to hating everyone on the set of The Departed. Even Jack Nicholson. “F*** Jack, too!” Nice.

GOING DOWN

Rehab romance

Odd couple Robbie Williams and Lindsay Lohan are enjoying a 12-step postrehab relationship. Oh to be a fly on the padded wall.

Hobbit overkill

J. R. R. Tolkien’s Children of Hurin finally arrives! Yay! Publisher HarperCollins calls it an “epic story of adventure, tragedy, fellowship and heroism”. We can already taste the Happy Meal.

Rickaaaay!

National hero Ricky Gervais has signed up to star in the Spielberg movie Ghost Town, about a dentist who sees the dead. The, er, decay of Britcom brilliance starts here.

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