Your Eurovision song, Flying the Flag (For You), has been described as “absolute s***” by Charlotte Church. How do you sleep at night?

David Ducasse: Very easily, thank you. Obviously Charlotte Church is entitled to her opinion. But I don’t think it makes her look very good to be using that sort of language, personally.

So, flight attendants. Why?

David: It’s camp, it’s fun and it’s an original statement. It’s also an excuse to wear some fantastically kitsch outfits.

But doesn’t that fly in the face of everything Eurovision stands for?

Caroline Barnes: No, I think we tick every box. The song is memorable and we have a great visual performance. We work on many different levels. We’re not just taking the mick.

Given the death-or-glory mentality of the typical Eurovision act, aren’t you worried that some countries might think you’re being disrespectful?

Natalie Powers: Absolutely not. We’re sincere in our performance. Some people are saying we’re the new Bucks Fizz.

Of course, there’s always the chance they’ll just think you’re rubbish.

Natalie: Well, we’ve recorded the song in many different languages, so hopefully they’ll know what we’re about.

How will you feel if you get “nul points” like Jemini a few years back?

Caroline: I absolutely refuse to believe that will happen.

Still, if you do badly, will you blame it on Government foreign policy?

Caroline: The voting has got so political over the years. But I think that things have calmed down a little bit now.

The world is waiting with baited breath for the Scooch position: do you think Britain should pull troops out of Iraq immediately?

David: We don’t have any comment on that. We’d rather talk about the music.

You’ve just signed to Warners. Presumably it’s not a five album deal?

Caroline: Actually, it’s actually an option for five albums. We’ve got a single coming out on May 7, but if that doesn’t sell, then we’ll go back to our own lives.

You were launched as a pop band to rival Steps in the late Nineties. Don’t tell me you’ve been knocking around the music industry all this time.

David: No. After we broke up on 2000, I went back into education and did an HND in musical theatre, then opened a theatre school.

Caroline: I’ve been in The Producers for the past three years. Russ [Spencer, who doesn't take part in the interview] has become a familiar face on Quiz TV.

Natalie: And I had a baby. He’s six now.

Justin Hawkins of the Darkness was clearly desperate to win A Song for Europe. Did you feel sorry for him when he lost?

Caroline: He’s a big boy and we all have to take rejection. I actually thought he was joking when he stormed off.

Will you be miming on May 12?

David: No, you’re not allowed to. Anyway, it’s not an issue. We can all sing live.

Are you prepared for a return to obscurity come May 13?

David: Yes, if it all ends next weekend, we’ll just give ourselves a pat on the back and say, “At least we’ve made our mark.” We’ve enjoyed coming this far. Everything else is just an added bonus.

Scooch will be representing Britain in the Eurovision Song Contest in Helsinki on May 12

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