Pete Paphides, Chief Rock Critic
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“Let's not take it away from him - let's congratulate him,” he said. But, with seconds to go before the end of a 205-minute broadcast, Sir Terry Wogan's feelings about this year's Eurovision Song Contest, the Russian song that won it and the way that it won were about as warm as the wind that whips through Red Square in winter.
He had explicitly alleged that “politics” would win it for Believe by Dima Bilan, and then - as the song stretched its lead ahead of Greece and Armenia - became strangely maudlin. We couldn't see him, but as early as the third round of voting - in which Russia received the maximum 12 points from Ukraine - the twinkling Wogan of all our Eurovision yesterdays had been ousted from his seat and replaced by Dark Terry.
“Ukraine just want to be sure that the old electricity and the oil flows through,” was his muttered reaction. As the fate of Britain's singing dustman Andy Abraham became clear, Dark Terry levelled his criticism at clearly inferior songs that had won more points. Admittedly, there weren't many (inferior songs that is - it turned out that every song received more points than us). Referring to Rodolfo Chikilicuatre - Spain's wretched Elvis-wigged equivalent of Timmy Mallett - he gasped: “I simply don't believe it. They've had 53 [points] for Chikichiki.” From Wogan's vantage point, Andy Abraham “gave the performance of his life” - which told you rather more about Abraham's life than the forgettable sub-Stock Aitken & Waterman dreck he was there to sing.
Inasmuch as Russia's song was just as rubbish, and great tunes by Croatia and Portugal floundered mid-table, Wogan had a point. Having failed to win it for Russia two years ago, Dima Bilan brought reinforcements in the form of a tiny ice rink, an unhinged violinist and, to his left, a blond, mullet-haired ice-skater. As Belarus - a country who, lest we forget, had overwhelmingly opposed independence from Russia - lobbed douze points in their direction, you could sense something fermenting in the commentary box. It was a thoroughly fed-up call to arms from a broadcasting titan. Referring, in part, to the departure of Kevin Bishop, the BBC's Eurovision producer, Wogan said: “He and I have to decide whether we want to do this again.”
Then, in what might be Europop's equivalent of the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand, Sir Terry suggested that “Western participants have to decide whether they want to do this again.” All of which left one wondering if a little perspective had been lost here. In 1980, 62 countries boycotted the Olympic Games in protest at the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan. The action prompted Peter Gabriel to write Games Without Frontiers - a song that tried to highlight the childish way that nations interact with each other. Now, in 2008, we're talking about boycotting the Russian Eurovision because we came bottom.
Tell you what. Let's just give it one more try, but with a decent song, eh? And if we still come bottom, then we'll ponder the only dignified option left.Pull out? The country where the “These Colours Don't Run” T-shirt was invented? Pah! Far from it!
No, here's what I was thinking. We quickly cede independence to Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland, Cornwall, the Isle Of Man, the Isle Of Wight, Guernsey, Jersey and Alderney, thereby making them eligible for Eurovision. And then, let the back-scratching commence.

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I don't believe for a moment any of the performers are under illusion as to the serious(n|l)ess of this event. The production is fun and a great time is had by all - tounge in cheek.
It amuses me no end to see Mr. Wogan et al seemingly genuinely irritated, didnt they get invites to the after party
Peter, Kent, UK
Eurovison voting has been a farce since technology allowed the introduction of telephone voting. Bring back the jury who must be appointed by clear criteria, some music professionals, some members of the public representative of that nation, some professional people etc etc.
It is a song contest!
Alan Bennett, Crowborough,
please, please bbc if UK do not enter next year, please do not waste my tv licence on a rubbish that somwhat is making the uk look foolish.. No more eurovision, thank god
wthomas, newark,
Let's just withdraw our funding and let them get on with it. If the eastern block nations want to believe they are winning due to superior songs and performers, let them. We can just laugh at them. Everyone knows that Britain leads the world in music. We don't need a third rate contest to prove it.
Doug, Uttoxeter, UK
Is it just possible that the countries concerned have more in common, musically?
Countries that share a common musical culture are more likely to appreciate each other's songs, and vote for each other.
Sour grapes, anybody?
Chris, Peterborough,
The British Song aside, there were other better songs in the contest that did just as badly. Sweden, Germany, Portugal.......all good songs which did just as bad and had no hope of winning.
Its just political voting.
david, london, uk
It is such a shame that politics seem to have influenced the thing that speaks to everyone, music;...but it has and I say, let them get on with it, Britain has so many things to be proud of and Andy did us proud....we are in it because we part fund it where does it get us though...nowhere...enough!
Emma, Mansfield, Notts
Guys, just send a better song. Andy Abraham is good but late 70`s funk is not quite a popular at this time. By the way, it`s not so clever idea to split yourselves into a 20 regions, trust me, I`m ex-Yu guy. It`s a bloody business. You wanted so many countries in Europe, so face the consequences.
Neil Watters, Belgrade, Serbia
I think that Terry Wogan has acted like a twit; after years of taking the mick out of Eurovision he suddenly decides to take it seriously and throw a strop. For what its worth, I thought that this year's was one of the better Eurovision contests, with ridiculous political voting and all.
Paul, Gibraltar,
How are you going to 'cede independance' to The Isle of Man, Guernsey, Jersey and Alderney ? They've never been a part of the United Kingdom.
Manuel de Vol, Garmisch-Partenkirchen, Germany
Wogan has made a career out of making Eurovison a joke then cries into his beer because we don't win? He suggests every other country is backward and not deserving of the points but Britain puts out a "cutting edge" 1960's disco number. Get serious if you want to be taken seriously.
Chris, London,
So the BBC won't withdraw it's funding to the Eurovision. Let's hope that the powers that be take account of this when there is another call to raise the licence fee
Peter Kelly, Haworth, West Yorks.
I find it hilarious that anyone at all is taking this ridiculous 'contest' seriously...
Murray Abisch, London, England
I am a Belgian living in Riga (Latvia). 40% of Latvian citizens are Russian, still orientated towards Russia. There is a proven financial support of Poetin for the Russian movements in former USSR countries. The Russian threat is still present, despite EU membership. So the voting is no surprise.
Peersman, Riga, Latvia
Its not about gas and elecricity supplies. One should realise, lots of ethnical Russians live in ex-Soviet block countries, incl. the Baltic States (1/3 in Estonia + Lithuania, 1/2 in Latvia). And I do not think that UK invested much in their song, hence the result. Nothing to do with politics
Andre, London, UK
Maybe its Eastern Europe to blame also that England is not on the EURO 2008??? Maybe the English should pull out of every other EURO Championship just because they didnt qualify for this one?! You had bad song! Face it!
Ana, Skopje, Macedonia
What none of you is prepared to spell out is that this is a vote for a country's popularity. And UK is, politically, by a simple man on the street of Europe, despised like never before. We appease and slavishly support America in Middle East and we pay. Becoming a pariah is a price we pay.
Eva, Brighton,
What the buzz???Tell me what's a happening???Of course,Dima Bilan is not real pop-star,like Robert Plant!We should eccept it,but think about Robert Plant...
Vladimir, Vladivostok, Russia
I have been a devout fan of Eurovision for years. It was one of the few chances any of us in the UK had to hear songs in foreign language. The Italians abandoned Eurovision some years ago because the songs were so bad and the voting too political. Time for a return to some basics?
Paul, London, England
Britain should boycott the Eurovision song contest. We should stage our own song contest based on the best song and not on who can dress up in the silliest outfit and jump around like a lunatic. ugh !!
Ellen, Largs, Ayrshire
Let's face it, we are only in the final because we stump up most of the money. Pull the money and lets see where we end up [ alternatively let everyone sing in their own language without anyone knowing which country is playing and see what happens!
Kay, leicester,
It was a thoroughly decent song and as for the writer's comment about it being "sub-Stock Aitken & Waterman dreck", that shows incredible ignorance of the history of popular music. Abrahams' song owes far more to soul music of the 1960s than it does to shallow pop ditties of the 1980s.
Milton Rhodes, Streatham, England
If Germany and the UK pull out as we should, then the whole competition will come to an end as we are the ones who pay for the majority of the cost anyway.
Let's leave eastern 'europe' to it and see how long it lasts without our financial backing!
E Spencer, Stratford, UK
Since when did you expect jingoistic Terry to be appreciative of other countries?? Even if you trained a donkey to represent Britain and get 12 points .... oh that little man terry would be very happy and proud ,simply because that donkey is British !!! And its song... oh, so melodious and musical !
Amod, London, United Kingdom
Englishmen - ridiculous... :))
That's all. :))
Valeriy, Moscow, Russia
common, guys, do not be jealous!! JUST ACCEPT IT AND move on and do not look for justification! Russia won first time in the history of Eurovision and if it was political it would have won before. Get a better singer instead of the rubbish you sent there!!!!!!
Olga Ruzaeva, Seattle, USA
You are not alone ;-)
Harro, Dresden, Germany
What Wogan understands is that just because something has poor taste doesn't mean it's valueless.
If we want Europe's Campiest Music Videos we can do that show for much cheaper, and without duping aspiring musicians into believing they're entering a contest.
dave, reading, UK
It's wrongly blamed on geopolitics, mostly it's diasporas voting for their home country. But we also need to realise that Russia, Serbia etc enter really top pop stars who are known throughout the east. We enter unknowns, in the wrong genres. If we entered Robbie Williams we might do better.
Andy, Derby, UK
I don't know what Wogan is talking about. With that travesty, Abraham thoroughly deserved to come dead last. Perhaps if the West put forward some decent acts, they'd get a better result. Political voting or not, the Eastern entries blew the Big 4 out of the water - yes, even the singing pirates.
Lauren, Sydney, Australia
Eurovision is not decided by judges in a dark room. The public in each country have the chance to vote.
It stands to reason that people will like songs that are culturally familiar. That is what music is about.
Most countries now sing in English. Surely the UK is the winner on this score!!
chris sato, akita, japan
What a load of childish rubbish. Many years ago punters were complaining about the voting, as in - we voted for them, so they should vote for us. Honestly with all that is going on in the world, the last thing to raise ones blood pressure over should be this puerile nonsense. Get a life folks.
Roz Walters, Barnsley, UK
Lets ask a pro to do our next Eurovision entry - Leona Lewis anyone? If we still come bottom, I think we can just leave the Warsaw Pact to it - its a rubbish competition full of third-raters anyway. Better yet, lets do a sing-off with the US, called NAMO - the North Atlantic Music Organisation!
Finn, London, UK
lol! I like Pete's solution.
Mind you, can you really see those plate-of-chips-on-the-shoulder Scots voting for England?
Phill, The Wirral, England
I didn't miss much then?
Ann, Woburn, UK
The only appeal of Eurovision was the glitzy, eurotrash, high camp cheesiness of it all.
Sadly, it is now a politcal showcase for solidarity or (more ominously) dislike of countries like the UK. Our entry this year could have been the Beatles in their prime but they would still have come last...
Peter Newman, London,
I watched the show on Saturday night and felt it was more of a Eastern Eurovision Song Contest then a Eurovision Song Contest. It was an absolute farce and quiet agree that it is no longer a singing competition. I think we should drop out of it all together and leave the Eastern block to it!
Sarah , Kettering , England
Andy Abraham did his best with the rubbish song he was given. Russian Dima Bilan's singing wasn't the best for him but it wasn't a bad song. I say, if Pete Waterman and his old-fashioned tastes 'butt out' and we have someone prettier, with much better song representing us next - we'll have a chance.
Mary, London, UK
To avoid the disappointment of seeing abysmal songs win in political standoffs, only songs worthy of being called 'music' should qualify to represent a country. It's a shock that some of them were able to crawl past the judges and allowed to pollute our screens.
Natalie, London, UK
What a load of tosh! The songs that is. The contest was always supposed to be about the songs, now it appears to be more about production or shock value or sex or (now) politics. The songs are all crap, so winning is just a meaningless accolade. Why can't the contest just do what it's supposed to?
C Elder, Kenilworth, UK
To see if it was political we need to start now and get some of our world class singers and writers involved and put together a great classic song for next year. Then if it does not get good marks we will know it is a fix
knight, aberdeen, uk
I don't know what the fuss is all about. England will still be rolling out hits and rest of the world will be buying them. Who cares about Eurovision!?
Feel bad for Andy though.
PK, Leeds,
I 've never taken Eurovosion seriously..I'm an R&B man myself, and no matter what music anyone plays, no matter where i've been on my travels, it's still english they listen too in any club. The music from the USA and UK is just so major, it can't be ignored. So who cares Terry !
riz, birmingham,
I am actually staggered that people still watch this.... didn't it run out of steam about 20 years ago?
JA, London,
The song contest was a bit of fun now it's a joke.
We can't ask any British singer in future to subject themselves to this kind of humiliation.Andy Abraham did a great job , the song was as good as some and better than most. We must stop financing it and make the east pay for their own ego trip.
elaine O'rourke, Neath, Wales UK
Maybe the time has come to think the Unthinkable.
We're going to have to vote for the Germans and the French.
My granddad will be turning in his grave but desperate times, desperate measures
dan, londonshire,
Putting the politics in results interpretation and trying to play on worn out pro-communist andtidemocracy plot IS stupid IMO. If Terry will loose the wallet or accidentally step in dirt on the street tomorrow - we will know that Putin stands behind it for sure.
Thank you, Terry, you're soo clever!
Vladimir, Moscow, Russia
What people don't seem to understand is that quite a few of these Eastern/Balcan block performers are huge stars in their respective countries and the neighbouring countries too. Neighbours vote for them because they know them and they like their music - it's not all about politics!
Nat, London,
LOL.
We know in Russia, that Eurovision is the dump of Music World. And Eurovision voting is nothing but rubbish too.
But why you understand it now, when Russia won?
Nedotyko, Togliatti, Russia
I was also one of the unfortunate viewers that had to watch the song contest in the UK. Unfortunate because i had to listen to the racist comments of your national hero Mr. Wogan. It's a shame for Andy and his song. Good performance. But just remember that your bookies voted long before Europe did.
Costas, Athens, Greece
I disagree with Pete in The Times. Andy Abraham's song was very good, and I thought it and the Greek entry were the best in the contest. It sucks that the voting was so biased.
Peter O'Connor, Hove, England
I agree about bland songs. It's time Britain stopped putting out Europop dross for Europe. Instead of letting them have something generic and acceptable lets hit them with Urban, Hip-Hop, Punk, etc. ie something their kids listen to and who cares about the points. Reform the Prodigy and burn them.
Martin, Bristol, UK
Why take this all so serious. It is good for a laugh and we are used to rubbish songs all way long. Why complain to end up at the bottom, if we send rubbish songs by inferior artists ? Other countries still send their top artists. Ours are far too scared to do or just can not be bothered.
Klaus, Berlin, Germany
You honestly think the Scots would vote for England??? We'd rather let the Russians have it!
Ash, Edinburgh,
Its cannot be true that nobody likes us!! If it were true then why has half of eastern Europe come to live with us?
Bill, Sheffield, England
Wogan's constant sniping is gut wrenching!
This from the UK; a broken, parochial, and out of touch society!
Europe's new countries have liberated themselves from their colonial past, unlike the UK whose future is still in the past!
The baton's been passed and Wogan doesn't like it!
Rog Brown, London, UK
Every year on the BBC's Eurovision selection programme, we are presented with 6 pleasant-but-forgettable songs from which to select our entry. Until the BBC shows some imagination and puts forward some songs that people around Europe will remember, we will always finish near the bottom of the pile.
Richard, Bristol,
i watch it every year.. this year i was so disgusted with the bias that i went to bed after the first ten votes. what a load of rubbish. i think we should pull out. our song was rubbish, but there was some great ones that just failed to get the votes....
emma, calne, england
Justin Hawkins would have won it.
lagowski, Surbiton,
To AW Moscow: in is funny what you just said. It is funny to hear such claim from the country, that in past blamed not politics, but singers themselves! When Bilan lost to Lordi 2 yrs ago, Russian television was whining that "these are just freaks, we're still first among human beings".
Askar, Oulu, Finland
We only stay in it so that no one else has to come bottom... What nice british people we are!
We just lack neighbours.... (yay for ireland giving us points, we love you! and the other country...don't remember who that was now...)
Nina, Salisbury, England
Dear Terry, just get trained to be loser. We are champions and it just the fact.
AW, Moscow, Russia
Did they vote to have gas an electricity? Fine at least since 1956 this festival has found a reason to be. Let's face it we don't care about it it is only our irracional patriotic side who feels insulted. This festival has always been camp and tacky beyond words.
M Ferrer, VIGO, Spain
We are Russians currently living in UK (well, and reading The Times). We can only agree that Eurovision songs are all rubbish but having a kind of "sport" ineterest we tried to vote for Dima. We called more than once but the appropriate phone line was busy all the time. Interesting, isn't it?
Vasily, London,
We could always change the goal post by AIMING to come last -and thereby 'winning' every time. Terry could have some fun with the voting system then! Otherwise, pull out and let the East European block votes pay for the contest.
Andy you did a good performance with a mediocre song.
Donna Walker, Effingham, England
It's not about the UK getting points; it's about the best/whacky song winning. The political votes were funny when there were just a few....Terry kept us entertained for years with his jibes about them. Now it seems a majority are going down the political voting route..so it's not funny any more.
paul, London,
Stick to broadcasting Terry. You always have too many opinions on everything and really don't count much despite thinking you do.
miketally, Maidstone, UK
Come on, we have to stay in! Bill Bailey might do it next year!
rupaZer0, Cambridge,
'Inasmuch as Russia's song was just as rubbish,...' What awful writing. I'd like to expect better in The Times.
Steve, Torrington,
I really don't know why we've bothered this long! Such a farce!
Michele, cottesmore, England
Sorry Europe, but Eurovision songs are all lame, including our own. No matter how many trapeze artists or ice rinks you throw in, it just won't change the fact that the songs are all rubbish, and always will be. But at least, even though it's political, it's a relatively harmless farce!
Andrew Corr, Burton On Trent, England
We need to just pull out NOW and not after next year. The whole contest is just so political. Andy Abraham was much better than many of the entries.
Zara, London,