Back in the good old days there was actually a race for the Christmas No 1 spot. It was a time of year when the British record-buying public went temporarily insane, and novelty tat went up against credible acts in a bid to top the charts.

Now all we’ve got to choose from is a ragbag of two-bit comedy pap, and precious little else, as the record labels protect their artists from being swallowed up by Simon Cowell’s all-consuming X Factor winner.

Such is the assured dominance of the show’s champion that the bookmakers made overtures to Cowell in November, suggesting that he reinvigorate the Christmas market by holding the release of the winner’s song until January.

The response was, as expected, firm. “It would be ridiculous if our business plan was dictated by the bookies,” said a spokeswoman for Syco, Cowell’s record label.

So this year we have Alexandra Burke, selling as many as the rest of the Christmas top ten combined. Last year it was Leon Jackson, before that Leona Lewis, and in 2005 Shayne Ward warbling That’s My Goal took the No 1 slot. An as-yet-undiscovered X Factor winner is already favourite to top the charts in 12 months’ time.

The only winner not to have topped the yuletide charts was Steve Brookstein, in 2004, who had the misfortune to go up against the 20th anniversary rerelease of Band Aid’s Do They Know It’s Christmas?

The age of assured dominance is not new, however. In the mid-Nineties, as girl power gripped the nation, clever scheduling saw the Spice Girls top the Christmas charts three years in a row, 1996 to 1998. The Beatles managed a similar feat in 1963, 1964 and 1965.

The marketing push a prime-time Saturday-night series can give an act – and while the rest of the music industry doesn’t have the wit or the courage to come up with a yuletide challenger – means that Cowell’s protégés are a cert to keep topping the charts. Until another Band Aid rerelease, of course.

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