Enter our Snapshots of Summer photography competition

On a tiny stage in a subterranean comedy club a Dutch comedian is making the Edinburgh Fringe his own. Starting out pretending to be so nervous that he’s stuttering, ending with a song about Nostradamus, his act is nonsense, real nonsense. And yet as he plays Popeye the Sailor Man on his cheeks, or tells shaggy-dog stories about his magician father, he’s selling it with all the intensity of Ian McKellen playing Lear. Amping himself up like Jim Carrey or a young Steve Martin, he is blissfully, painfully funny – even if none of us quite knows why. Then again, he’s only playing a 20-minute set, at the end of a variable bill of Dutch comedians. Can Hans Teeuwen really be this good for a whole show?
We’ll find out later this week, when he plays his first full English-lnaguage shows. And if anyone can overturn the comic stereotoype of vowel-churning Netherlanders – Goldenmember in the third Austin Powers film; Harry Enfield’s gay policemen – it's Teeuwen.
He is a household name at home, where he has played huge tours and sold half a million DVDs. He’d probably be knocking them dead in Nijmegen tonight if he hadn’t applied his anarchic instincts to his own career. “It got to the point where I could predict the future,” he says. “And if I can predict the future I become uneasy.” So four years ago he vowed to stop performing in Dutch. To start all over again.
Sitting in an office at the Soho Theatre – “very, very good for my English to do this” – Teeuwen, 40, has a glint in his eye backed up by a careful comedy brain. He’s far from the slightly menacing madman you see on stage. “Well, what I do is acting,” he says. “And if you do surreal stuff, nonsense stuff, you have to act out everything to give it some significance. That’s part of why I stopped – it’s exhausting.”
If that sounds precious, you haven’t seen Teeuwen. In Holland, where he would perform for more than two hours, he used to refuse to play more than three nights in a row. Here, he’s playing a one-hour show, five nights a week, in a 140-seater: “It’s a nice lesson in humility,” he chuckles. “That’s always good for an artist.” He started out in a double act, Heist, in the early 1990s. But after a year together they had a car crash coming home from a gig. His partner, Roland Smeenk, died. “I was in bed for six months, depressed. Then I had to start again.”
Going it alone, he spurned the leftist agenda of some comedians – not because he disliked their politics, more because he didn’t want to hear them on stage. “There are lots of comedians that have a message. I hate that. I want to be amoral on stage. It gives you more possibilities.”
So it’s ironic that this apolitical performer has become a spokesman for freedom of speech ever since he stopped performing in Dutch. “I never wanted to be political,” he says, “but I had no choice.” In November 2004, his friend the film director Theo van Gogh was brutally murdered by an Islamic extremist, Mohammed Bouyeri, incensed by a documentary van Gogh had made about Islam’s treatment of women.
When Teeuwen unveiled a statue to van Gogh in Amsterdam, he made a speech that mixed passion, humour, and a filthy song that told believers just what they could do with their prophet. He went on to defend that song against three Muslim women on a television show they hosted, Bimbos en Boerkas (Bimbos and Burkas). “Everything with a certain status has a certain power,” he told them. “Power always tends to corrupt, and has to be ridiculed.”
Actually, he points out, he had always put meatier material into his act. But he would be wilfully extreme about it: “With really serious subjects you can be subtle, but you can also go, like, floooaaargh! – as if you are not aware there is a taboo at all. That strikes me as funny.
“But if I used that same method with Islam in one of my shows now,” he says, “I would be in big, big trouble. I was brought up in a period of time in Holland where anything could be said. Ten years ago I remember comedians saying: ‘There are no more taboos, what are we going to do?’ Well thank God – literally – we found one again.”
Teeuwen is a wild and crazy, ambitious and analytical guy. He’s launching his own comedy website in March. Last year he toured with a jazz band, singing Sinatra songs. He’s serious about his singing too. “I want to have alternatives,” he says. “The way that I’m funny on stage, I think that there’s a time limit to it. I don’t know many people who are all that funny after 55.”
Can Teeuwen become a genuine star all over again in the English language? No European comic since the great Victor Borge (Danish) has really done it. But Teeuwen has the talent, and the sensibility, for his nonsense to make sense the whole world over.
“A lot of English humour is about embarrassment,” he says. “ The Office is all about that, Extras too. Maybe it’s your class system. But we don’t have that in Holland. We don’t look up to people. Don’t think that you’re more than anyone else, you know? Everyone has to be as equal and flat as the country itself.”
Hans Teeuwen is at the Soho Theatre, W1 (0870 4296883), from Friday
Win a luxury weekend to Newcastle and its neighbour Gateshead, find out more here
Risk, resilience and embracing new technology
Industry sectors news at a glance. Interactive heatmap, video and podcast
Discover the power of collective thinking. Submit a solution and be in with a chance to win a Media Hub Home Entertainment System
The inside track on current trends in the charity, not for profit and social enterprise sectors
Everything the Business Traveller needs to know to make a better trip
Make the most of the summer and enter our fabulous photographic competition, you could win a £5000 holiday
Corsica is an island of beauty and contrast, an ideal holiday destination
Enjoy further reading from Travel to Fashion, Business to Sport, discover more
Shortcuts to help you find sections and articles
The clever way to lease a new car is with Car leasing made simple™
2009
per month on 36-month
Personal Contract Hire (PCH)
2008
42850
Car Insurance
£24,250 - £30,346
MI5
London
£60,000
The Environment Agency
Bristol
Up to £90K
Boots
Midlands
OTE £85k
Credit Protection Association
Nationwide Opportunities
Completely London
Luxury Condo's in Manhattan with NYC views
The best new homes in Wimbledon?
Nationwide
Fabulous Cruise And Cruise & Stay Offers Including Virgin Atlantic Flights Prices Start From Only £699pp!
Last Minute Cruise And Cruise & Stay Offers. Med From £499pp, Caribbean From £699pp!
5 star quality at a 3 star price.
8 fabulous Canadian cities ...you won’t find cheaper
Contact our advertising team for advertising and sponsorship in Times Online, The Times and The Sunday Times, or place your advertisement.
Times Online Services: Dating | Jobs | Property Search | Used Cars | Holidays | Births, Marriages, Deaths | Subscriptions | E-paper
News International associated websites: Globrix Property Search | Property Finder | Milkround
Copyright 2009 Times Newspapers Ltd.
This service is provided on Times Newspapers' standard Terms and Conditions. Please read our Privacy Policy.To inquire about a licence to reproduce material from Times Online, The Times or The Sunday Times, click here.This website is published by a member of the News International Group. News International Limited, 1 Virginia St, London E98 1XY, is the holding company for the News International group and is registered in England No 81701. VAT number GB 243 8054 69.
I am so contented that Hans has come to England. I have moved here from Holland myself three years ago and I never expected the land of the cupcakes to be more up for Dutch confrontation than Holland itself.
I taught Theo van Gogh's son and I will never forget the day of his fatherâs murder. Boundaries are broken by putting things in the open and satire is a way of making this easier. Violence is never an option, it's simply an act of primitive idiots who lack the intelligence to confront in words.
Hans' work is critical, intelligent and frankly hilarious. He will prove to the English public that it is not just them who understand what comedy is about. I wish Hans all the luck with this new start.
Love Tina
Tina van Wouw, London,
@Tim
If I had the money to go to London and tot a show, I would've.
But I'm just a student with less money...
And to go with Rick, he's my favorite too, so that's two ;)
Lisanne de Jong, Zoetermeer, (South-)Holland
@Frie
Holland itself is not a province of The Netherlands...
I guess u meant North-Holland and South-Holland, these provinces are in the west of The Netherlands.
Rick, ., The Netherlands
Teeuwen is a great comedian, I'm 100% sure that he has great skills and he will show them in the UK and hopefully the rest of the world.
Teeuwen is my most famous comedian, so here you go Tim...
Rick, ., The Netherlands
Patsy; if you haven't lived in the UK you don't have any idea what you are talking about. The class system is much more engrained in the English culture than the Dutch one.
Tim; I know dozens of people who find Hans their favourite comedian; please refrain from saying things like that unless you actually know everyone in the Netherlands.
Frie; Holland can be used informally to denote the Netherlands. Do we not chant âHolland, Hollandâ during football matches? I presume we do not cheer for the two provinces North- and South Holland only now do we?
Markus; the guy has spend a lot of time in psychiatric wards and should not be taken too serious. He is extremely intelligent, but has a twist nobody can understand.
All in all, before anyone comments please think before doing so. Six friends of mine (and me) are going to see his show in London. I have spoken to the Dutch Embassy in London and it appears that his show is extremely popular amongst Dutch people living in London.
Mark, London,
So Mr. Teeuwen thinks we don't have a class system in the Netherlands? Ha-ha-ha. We are just more hypocritical about it.
People get judged on their accents, choice of words, the type of job they do, hobbies etc . all the time. What paper you read, what music you listen to - it's all about class.
Patsy, groningen, the Netherlands
Not a single Dutchman would think of Teeuwen as their most famous comedian - not even his agent.
Tim, London,
1. Holland is a province of the Netherlands, not the name of a country!
2. Ever heard of Toon Hermans? Now he was funny, without having to resort to gimmickry. He could have you go from rolling in the isles, to tears streaming down your face and back again, seemingly without any effort at all on his part.
Frie, Echternach, Luxembourg
I recently had the good fortune to gain some insight into the inner workings of Teeuwen's scattered brain. We shared the same B+B in Edinburgh for six weeks, after my wife had divorced me for infidelty with my Laptop. We often shared a quip after dinner over cheese and biscuits.
He confided, that much of his success rested in the fact that he wasn't afraid to take risks - as a student in Amsterdam in the 80's, he bunked many of his classes, preferring to spend his time in the Red Light District and seedy "poker" joints. He became so accomplished at "squeezing cards" that despite his poor lecture attendance record, he was able to win his Bachelors Degree in Agriculture and a Masters - Thesis entitled "Composting into the 21st Century" (he was exempted from the need for an Honours) in one five-day "winner takes all" poker game with the Chancellor.
He carries a bracelet around his left wrist made from scraps of the Chanceller's "biltonged" testicles, which he says brings him luck.
C Markus, Glasgow Outskirts City limits, Scotland