Attend a special evening hosted by Mike Atherton
I sit there feeling square. “One thing that has altered since we last spoke,” offers Brand, “is that I no longer have the zeal of the newly anointed in the realm of effortless promiscuity. [This is typical of his speech pattern, teetering between baroque inventiveness and swallowed-a-dictionary verbiage.] I think, well that can happen, but I try not to do it for the sake of it.” Groupies, you mean? “Yeah.” How does that work? “They come to the stage door. They make an effort, like salmon swimming upstream.”
I say I was surprised by how female the audience was in Birmingham. Close on two thirds, by my reckoning, mostly in their twenties, greeting his appearance with wolf whistles, proposals of marriage, and, in one case, bared breasts. “It’s difficult, Robert, not to be dictated to by the oestrogen in the room; they are a potent force, them women.”
What does he think is going on? “Presumably I must represent something they like.” And what’s that? “Well, some of my friends who are analytical and literary say I have become emblematic of a kind of sexual libertarianism that needn’t be pejorative.” Female sexual libertarianism? “Yeah. David Baddiel said this, he said I’d become a safe and acceptable way to express [female] promiscuity.”
Baddiel is a near neighbour in Hampstead. Since he made it big, Brand has been quick to befriend other celebrities. David Walliams is a pal, he isn’t far away either. And, a little further out into the leafy North London suburb, there’s Jonathan Ross. Brand wanted famous friends. He isn’t one of those celebrities who moans about fame as an unwelcome by-product of their job, although, even in Hampstead (“and it’s posh here”), being asked for autographs can get “relentless”. He now sits in a box rather than the stands when he goes to see West Ham. And yet he admits, “I felt the deficit of fame so strongly, I thought [when I became famous], right, thank God!”
His friendship with Ross, of course, gave rise to the Andrew Sachs scandal last autumn, an affair we spend much of our hour together discussing. Ross was a regular guest (as was Baddiel) on Brand’s Saturday night Radio 2 show. The actor Andrew Sachs, 78, who played Manuel in Fawlty Towers, had been booked to do an interview. When he failed to answer his phone, Brand and Ross, egging each other on, left him a string of messages. The watchdog the BBC Trust later called the prank a “deplorable intrusion”.
The context for the Sachs calls was that Brand had told Ross that he had slept with Sachs’s granddaughter, 23-year-old Georgina Baillie, a dancer with a burlesque troupe called the Satanic Sluts. When Brand was leaving his message, Ross called out, “He f***** your granddaughter.” Ross later speculated that Sachs probably had a photo of Baillie, aged about 9, near the phone. After a huge furore, Brand and Lesley Douglas, the controller of Radio 2, resigned. Ross was suspended for 12 weeks without pay.
There are two interpretations of the incident. On the one hand it was all whipped up by the Daily Mail. This is the way Brand wants to see it, offering the (bad) arguments that the whole thing has been over-analysed, that it was just a silly joke, that nobody much listened to the show anyway, that the press coverage stripped away the nuances of the broadcast. “It’s very easy to apply forensic analysis to something that is trivial,” he says.
And yet the Sachs scandal felt like something more than showbiz trivia. It divided the generations. Older people were appalled, younger ones amused. At 44, I found myself parting company with younger friends and colleagues: the pair’s behaviour, particularly Ross’s, was to my mind obnoxious and unforgivable even if it had been funny, which it wasn’t.
I put it to Brand that the truly offensive stuff came from Ross, the more so because Ross is 48, with a 17-year-old daughter and two other children, while Brand is 33 and childless. On the broadcast he, Brand, sounds like a man who realises his more famous, richer, more powerful buddy has just dumped him in it. “I understand your analysis but I don’t agree with it. I have a relationship on air with Jonathan and also I’ve got a friendship with him. I love him and admire him enormously and will say nothing to condemn him, he’s a lovely, warm, generous bloke, he was just showing off and being a twit.”
A chill descends on Brand’s kitchen when he realises his interviewer disapproves of what he and his mate did. One of the pitfalls of being a celebrity is almost everyone you meet tends either to be a fan, or on your payroll, or another celebrity. Perspective can be lost, although Brand insists he hasn’t lost his. “It’s not inconceivable I could be peeved about, say, a car not being there on time, but I’ve got enough people around me going, ‘Come on mate, it’s not that important, is it?’”
In any event, he doesn’t seem fully able to grasp the idea that people other than those who work for Associated Newspapers or are the wrong side of 75 might think he and Ross got it horribly wrong. “You wouldn’t have heard of it if it wasn’t for the Daily Mail,” he says.
As for intergenerational conflict: “Older people are not my demographic. They might disapprove of me because of my hair! I’m conscious when I’m performing that the audience think what I’m saying is, ‘F*** ’em! Let’s go and smash his [Sachs’s] garden up!’ I feel the energy of that, because people who are younger than me, they want me to say, ‘Good, shall I phone him again? Shall I phone him now?’” Do they? “Yeah, people think, ‘P*** off for being so prescriptive.’”
Industry sectors news at a glance. Interactive heatmap, video and podcast
Everything the Business Traveller needs to know to make a better trip
Get ready for the winter sports season, with our resort guides and snow reports
We are backing British business, what is the confidence of the nation and what businesses are succeeding?
Growing demand for energy, oil that is harder to reach and the rise of carbon dioxide emissions. We examine the energy challenge
With rail travel in Europe on the rise, we review the benefits of travelling by train
In this special section we explore new food trends to help improve your dinner party and impress guests
Enjoy further reading from Travel to Fashion, Business to Sport, discover more
Shortcuts to help you find sections and articles
1998
£47,955
12 months for the price of 11 and a 5% discount.
Offer ends 31/11/09
Check your free Experian credit report before applying
Car Insurance
£353 per day
Phonepay Plus
London
PwC’s Consulting practice helps businesses of all shapes and sizes work smarter and grow faster
PwC
£37,000
Department for Culture, Media and Sport
London
Currently £36,285
Department for Culture, Media and Sport
London
Moments from Battersea Park.
For sale with Winkworth
Find out about shared ownership.
See your free Experian credit report beforehand
Accommodation, flights, tickets to the race and a KL city tour for only £999pp
PremierHolidays.co.uk
For your ultimate tailor-made ski holiday, click here
Get covered on your travels with a superb range of policies at great prices. Visit InsureandGo.com
World Class Golf, Spa and preferential Beach Club. Private estate overlooking West Coast
Villas from £275 per night inclusive of Golf
Contact our advertising team for advertising and sponsorship in Times Online, The Times and The Sunday Times, or place your advertisement.
Times Online Services: Dating | Jobs | Property Search | Used Cars | Holidays | Births, Marriages, Deaths | Subscriptions | E-paper
News International associated websites: Globrix Property Search | Milkround
Copyright 2009 Times Newspapers Ltd.
This service is provided on Times Newspapers' standard Terms and Conditions. Please read our Privacy Policy.To inquire about a licence to reproduce material from Times Online, The Times or The Sunday Times, click here.This website is published by a member of the News International Group. News International Limited, 1 Virginia St, London E98 1XY, is the holding company for the News International group and is registered in England No 81701. VAT number GB 243 8054 69.