Is he a spiteful, malicious little man with ludicrously white teeth? Or is he a great wit who saves America’s top-rated show from becoming an all-out love-in?

Opinions on American Idol judge Simon Cowell vary wildly, but whether you revel in his honesty or despise his attitude, the man’s caustic wit deserves further study.

Here, we relive 20 of Cowell's finest comments, dished out to contestants, relatives and even dear old Bob Dylan.

1. “You should sue your singing teacher”

2. “I presume there was no mirror in your dressing room tonight."

3. “The end of the animal trade would leave more time to trap or beat to death pop star wannabes”

4. At age 4: "Mum, you look like a poodle"

5. On Bob Dylan: 'A singing poet? It just bores me to tears.'

6. “Shave off your beard and wear a dress. I think you’d be a great female impersonator”

7. "Did you really believe you could become the American Idol? Well, then, you're deaf."

8. "You have just invented a new form of torture"

9. "If you had lived 2,000 years ago and sung like that, I think they would have stoned you."

10. "The look, it was like something out of the Addams Family."

11. "You have the personality of a handle.”

12. "I’m tempted to ask if you sang that the night before your wife left you."

13. "You look like one of those creatures that live in the jungle with those massive eyes."

14. "What do you think we are looking for – a two-year-old who can't sing?"

15. "You were having fun. I'm not sure how much fun everyone at home was having."

16. "You came across as a background singer for a background singer."

17.. "You sounded like Cher after she's been to the dentist."

18. “Can I ask you a question? Do you and your girlfriend sing together at home? Have the police ever called?"

19. "You are fabulous but it was the singing that was slightly off-putting."

20. Simon: "What normally happens when you sing in public, Deborah?"

Deborah: "I've had a few people cry."

Simon: "I can believe that."

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