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Is he a spiteful, malicious little man with ludicrously white teeth? Or is he a great wit who saves America’s top-rated show from becoming an all-out love-in?
Opinions on American Idol judge Simon Cowell vary wildly, but whether you revel in his honesty or despise his attitude, the man’s caustic wit deserves further study.
Here, we relive 20 of Cowell's finest comments, dished out to contestants, relatives and even dear old Bob Dylan.
1. “You should sue your singing teacher”
2. “I presume there was no mirror in your dressing room tonight."
3. “The end of the animal trade would leave more time to trap or beat to death pop star wannabes”
4. At age 4: "Mum, you look like a poodle"
5. On Bob Dylan: 'A singing poet? It just bores me to tears.'
6. “Shave off your beard and wear a dress. I think you’d be a great female impersonator”
7. "Did you really believe you could become the American Idol? Well, then, you're deaf."
8. "You have just invented a new form of torture"
9. "If you had lived 2,000 years ago and sung like that, I think they would have stoned you."
10. "The look, it was like something out of the Addams Family."
11. "You have the personality of a handle.”
12. "I’m tempted to ask if you sang that the night before your wife left you."
13. "You look like one of those creatures that live in the jungle with those massive eyes."
14. "What do you think we are looking for – a two-year-old who can't sing?"
15. "You were having fun. I'm not sure how much fun everyone at home was having."
16. "You came across as a background singer for a background singer."
17.. "You sounded like Cher after she's been to the dentist."
18. “Can I ask you a question? Do you and your girlfriend sing together at home? Have the police ever called?"
19. "You are fabulous but it was the singing that was slightly off-putting."
20. Simon: "What normally happens when you sing in public, Deborah?"
Deborah: "I've had a few people cry."
Simon: "I can believe that."
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What do you think of Simon Cowell's comments?
Well, i think that he could be more constructive on saying people could do better -if he was a teacher he would bring people nowhere. He wasn't too happy when people insulted him.
Well, people get what they give. He clearly got some personal issues-nothing justifies such insults AT ALL.
Xavier Leroi, Antwerp, Belgium
I think Simon is hilarious and it proves that he likes Paula because he even said he loves her to death and I like him because he speaks his mind and never worries about the reaction which makes him stronger as a person.
Anna, Middlesbrough, UK
I adore Simon because whatever he says or does he doesn't worry about the reaction whatever the reaction is.
Anna, Middlesbrough, UK
I think without Simon, The X-Factor and Britains Got Talent would be disastrous because Simon knows which contestants are best and most appropriate in the shows and what the audience and viewers like to see. Them shows without Simon would be like toast without butter, tasteless and dull and I think the insults that he uses are the best. I wish I had a sense of humour as good as Simon's. I think Simon himself is a natural born talent for being who he is.
Anna, Middlesbrough, UK
I'm from South Africa and thoroughly enjoy American Idols. I can't wait for Tuesday and Wednesday nights. I think Simon has a crush on Paula and vica versa. I enjoy Randy's wit and I think, although Simon is rude and blatant, I agreed with him a lot of times when making a statement about the show. We love the way in which it is presented and the presenter is a dish!!!!!
Wilna Murphy, Nelspruit, South Africa
I'm a Jordin Sparks fan simply because she is from my home state and I think she is a adorable, but Melinda was by far a better singer than both Jordin and Blake. Unfortunately for Melinda, Idol seems to be about more than talent, but isn't showbiz in general? Nobody in their right mind thinks Britany Spears has a great voice, but America made her a multi-millionaire.
Betty, Tempe, AZ
I think American Idiots stinks ,I have tried to vote but could never get on, yet I heard Rubens mother once siad she voted 2 hundred times, so the figures that annoncer quotes is not how many people voted , it is how many votes were cast by people able to get thru, do like Dance witht the stars , limit the amount and just vote who to kick off ,not who to keep.Sanjay was fun , Halley was a fox I will buy her records., you could call the show :American Motown Idol:
Raul, Simi Valley, California,USA
With Melinda gone, I will NOT be watching the rest of the season.
This season has been the biggest bunch of twaddle I have ever seen. Only Melinda stood out. She will go on to become a legend.
As for Sparks and Lewis, we will not even remember their names by 2009!
Carol, Alamogordo, New Mexico
Here we go again with the criticism of Simon Cowell. Simon Cowell is a fantastic straight forward person who speaks his mind without a doubt about all things being right. He is far from being undeserving; insecure business insulting, bulling, arrogant, and humiliating man. I believe that when you have to judge many untalented musicians who wants to be a super star,than you have to have someone that is not afraid to speak the truth. That many of these want to be people are totally useless. You have face up to the fact that not everyone is allow to win,there has to be many losers, but one winner.Ok, then we have Melinda Doolittle in which everyone wanted her to win, but she lost ah,ah,ah,yeee!!!!!!!!!, in the end she failed to win hallelujah.Now the great Melinda Doolittle can return to and sing to both Tarzan, and the aminals................Ah,Ah,Ah............
NPJNYC1, Brooklyn , New York 11213
Melinda has been robbed, She is our american idol winner anyway , the proof's in the pudding. Long live melinda, winner of american idol 2007.
serena, London, uk
as a Canadian i watched each week, and Melinda was flawless. it will not be the same without her in the final. it looks to me that the system of voting is bush league. dancing with the stars has got a better idea. good luck to jordan and blake and to hell with who is the best singer overall. unless the voting is fairer you have now lost a fan. you are abot to loose many sponsors if you don't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pat coll, Vancouver, Canada
Simon Cowell is certainly super wealthy and he owns a program that is, without doubt, a phenomenal success.
However, he is a walking affront to the British virtues of civility, courtesy and gentlemanly manners which, I am sure, have not become obsolete.
To publicly humiliate, insult and embarrass poor people, who are only trying to improve their lots in life, is despicable! It is uncalled for and unnecessary...in too many instances.
Cowell is like the insecure business executive who gets off on
publicly insulting, bullying and humiliating his staff.
I don't believe that he is ! ! <<<BUT: He gives the appearance of being a cheap, low-class English fellow who needs to clean up his act...and be a better ambassador for Great Britain!
Garth Strong, Sherman Oaks, USA
The performers are frequently awful, but applauded like performing circus animals by the all-too-forgiving American crowds and judges,, so someone needs to tell it like it is. Simon's caustic to the point of lethal, but he's almost always spot on. That kind of killer wit is a rarity, especially combined with such painful truth. Personally, I think it's kind of sexy!
Debra, Leicester, UK
Blake is no American Idol material. His voice is rubbish!
stasia, Larnaca, Cyprus
Whilst I love Simon for his honesty, and agree that the show would be nothing without him - I think that he should curb the personal insults on the looks people are born with. Not all successful singers have been blessed with beauty after all!
Sally, Cornwall, England
I for one think he is fantastic, i see him like a great english warrior, a masterful tactician, who has gone on to conquer a far away land, admittedly one that will lap up with great glee the kind of trash that is American Idol, well done Mr Cowell.
Matthew Blackburn, Dublin, Ireland
He is not often wrong. He examins the whole act and is not caught up in the moment..
Hes the judge and if you are going to make it in life you have to handle constuctive criticsm. Whether you agree or not its up to the individual but handle it.and take it on board as another person opinion.
irene.ruddick, carlisle, england
Simon says things how he sees them and is honest in his opinion. At least he doesn't gush like Paula. I mostly agree with his comments, when Paula and Randy have said how good something is and I've been thinking "what show are THEY watching, as the singing was off key etc..", sure enough Simon will point out the areas lacking in the performance. Without him the show would not be as good and turn into a real borefest.
Gena, UK,
Simon Cowell has no talent.
There isn't one 'insight' he gives us that a moron couldn't also arrive at.
Here is a man involved in the 'pop music' business who has no musical talent.
Can he play an instrument?
Can he write a song? No?
Then why is he criticising those who have at least attempted a go.
I sit there sickened while my wife, and seemingly every so-called intelligent
woman in the land, finds it all riveting.
In answer to Susie from Cork - "Would I watch it without him there?'
No but like every sane man in this country, I await the decommissioning of this travesty of a show with baited breath.
KingKerouac, London,
It would not be the same without Simon either on American Idol or the British X Factor. Simon rulez!
Norma, Penang, Malaysia
So the omnipotent music svengali Cowell is 'bored to tears' by Bob Dylan? Well, from the man who endorsed the shameless corporate branding of pop songs ('Mighty Morphin Power Rangers', 'Bob the Builder' and countless other ear bleeders) I doubt that Mr Zimmerman is kept awake at night by such remarks. Cowell's a panto villain, a housewive's favourite and a man who has no perceptible right to criticise artists with the integrity, talent and dedication of aforementioned singer.
Daniel, Llanfairpwll, Wales
I have to say that I like Simon. He tells it as he sees it. He is in one of the most overcrowded professions in the world with no subsidies for the talentless to fall back on. We watch for the put downs: Sharon Osborne valiently trying to soften the blows and choosing the quirky. They both know their stuff and people need to be told at some point they haven't a hope in hell by someone. Too many have read the positive thinking books the self help industry have churned out and believe them. Let them down gently and they just waste their and everyone else's time.
My husband once had to audition hopefuls: so did a friend at another time. Both said how difficult it was to spot a real talent who coud do what was required of the part without having to take up valuable time training them up. Yes, raw talent is thrilling, but it needs discipline to fulfill its potential. Let's not waste people's precious time on this earth by pandering to their hopes and aspirations.
Carlyle and Len Braden, Croydon, U.K
Simon is the brains, the backbone and the humour of the show. Would you watch it without him there?
Susie, Cork,
His asinine comments always look and sound as though he's practised them in front of a mirror .And honestly, his personal vices and the state of health of his mother have NOTHING to do with what we think of his remarks!! Ginny
Ginny Swart, Cape Town ,
Dude doesn't like Bob Dylan and yet thinks he has some sort of authority?
Andrea, London,
Simon is boring. Many of his comments are absolutely stupid. The show would be so much better without him.
Lana, ---,
I love Simon! I am always a little nervous before he speaks because I never can tell what is going to come out of his mouth and I usually cringe a little bit as he speaks but it is so fun to hear what he has to say and then hear the audiences reaction. It is definitely critical that Simon is on the show and play the role that he plays on it! It is very entertaining!
Geri, San Diego, CA
Geri, San Diego, CA
Simon is a little 7-year-old boy. I love him and I Think he needs a snack and sippy cup up there. He is smart, Quick witted and funny. Lets enjoy him while we have him. He is a chain smoker. His dad died if a sudden heart attack and mom had Cancer. He a relentless workaholic and his true fans and loved ones worry about him. I rub that cutie pies feet anyime to calm his nerves.
Cheryl, BOSTON, MA
the show would be a complete bore without Simon. He is the
reason I watch and so do my friends.
susan, phila, pa, usa
Brilliant. Personal favourites from the list above are 16 and 17
Alan, Cher's dentist,
Simon says what the rest of us think (if we had such a quick mind) but due to being politically correct we do not say it. Plus in these days of political correctness, only Simon speaks his mind with crystal clearness.
Without Simon, there would be no show
M.Murray, London, England
awesome work Simon. Keep it up. lets have more of this and less of the sicophantic nonsense that most judges are happy to spool
simon mawdsley, london,
when he said that the little girl crying in the audience said it all
jerome, arlington, texas
Cruel but truthfully honest. I always look forward to his down to earth comments. Don't trust Paula's, she's always dithering here and there and tried too hard to say bad things nicely or poorly. Randy? He's 'pitchy' and 'yo man' stuff don't say much to be helpful. But Simon's words are like jewels. Listen carefully and accept the criticisms. They may just land you a contract one day by improving on your weaknesses.
Peter Yew, Seremban, Malaysia
"Do you have a music teacher?" Yes.
"Do you have a laywer?" No.
"Get a lawyer and sue your singing teacher."
Duane, Andover, MA
I have always been a fan of Simon Cowell ever since I watched him on XFacor back in the UK. He is honest but nasty. It depends on how you perceive his comments. Not many people would be daring enough to utter honest comments like him. My British mate said I'm weird, but really, one of the things I miss about the UK is Simon Cowell. Simon Cowell rulez!
Norma, Penang, Malaysia