David Chater
Attend a special evening hosted by Mike Atherton
The Primary
BBC Two, 7pm
The cameras follow the staff and pupils for one term at Welford Primary School in Birmingham, which has never had more than ten white pupils out of a total of 480. The pupils come from 17 ethnic backgrounds, and - contrary to Enoch Powell's dire warnings - there is no river foaming with blood anywhere to be seen. The school is not a Utopia and there are outbursts of interracial nastiness between the pupils. But it comes across as a warm, inclusive place, filled with energy. “Children are children,” says the grandmother of one of the only two white children in the school. “It doesn't matter what sort they are.”
Sport Relief Does The Apprentice
BBC One, 9pm
In a special one-off to raise money for Sport Relief, two teams of celebrities - the boys and girls - are given identical stores in the West End. They have to dream up a name for the store and stock it with luxury items to flog to the rich and famous for the highest possible profit, while cuddly Sir Alan Sugar and his two trusty sidekicks - Nick Hewer and Margaret Mountford - give them as much grief as possible. The girls' team is made up of Clare Balding, Lisa Snowdon, Jacqueline Gold, Kirstie Allsopp and Louise Redknapp. The boys' team consists of Phil Tufnell, Lembit Opik, Kelvin MacKenzie, Hardeep Singh Kohli and Nick Hancock. Let the rumpus begin.
Rock Rivals
ITV1, 9pm
The two judges - Michelle Collins and Sean Gallagher - continue to go head to head, with each one using their Pop Idol - sorry, Rock Rival - protégé to score points off the other. The long-lost mother of one of the competitors arrives on the scene, only to be exposed in the tabloids under the headline: “Rock Rivals' Mum Is a Baby Killer.” On a more prosaic note, it will be curious to see what effect this show has on the share price of the company behind it, Shed Media, which had fallen from a 52-week high of 108p to a low of 63p after Bad Girls and Footballers' Wives were axed. Rock Rivals could yet provide fun for the whole family, suits 'n' all.
Wonderland: The Curious World of Frinton-on-Sea
BBC Two, 9.50pm
The film-maker Marc Isaacs is an astonishing talent. He uses the camera like a painter, focusing on images that seem to bleed atmosphere. But much more than that, he has a gift for highlighting the wonder and strangeness of people. Sometimes he lets the camera do the watching; on other occasions, he prods his subjects in much the same way that David Attenborough would prod a reptile - with fascination, sympathy and amazement. In tonight's film, he visits the retired community of Frinton-on-Sea where residents are involved in a fight to retain the old-fashioned gates across the railway line. “A lot of people in Frinton never, ever wanted to live here,” says one elderly resident. “They're still here. Don't know why.” This bittersweet mixture of resignation and defiance compounds the melancholy beauty of the film.
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