Pulp Fiction was a seminal film. Will Shakespeare was a seminal poet. Obviously it follows that the two should be mixed together, which is exactly what has been done at Pulp Bard. Forsooth, various anonymous contributors have translated Tarantino into iambic pentameter. I recommend watching the famous “Say what again” scene on YouTube before reading the Shakespearean version.

For background, the Samuel L. Jackson character is asking a terrified man why he’s run off with Marcellus Wallace’s money. Jules: “Speak ‘What’ again! Thou cur, cry ‘What’ again!/I dare thee utter ‘What’ again but once!/I dare thee twice and spit upon thy name!/Now, paint for me a portraiture in words/ If thou hast any in thy head but ‘What’/Of Marsellus Wallace!”. The rest of the scene, even in the Bard’s language, is too rude to be reprinted.

In the rat race we call life it’s often good to pause for thought. In those contemplative moments, Web Watcher can heartily recommend Phistophicles, the lesser-known Greek philospher. Perhaps more niche than the more mainstream thinkers such as Plato and Aristotle, Phistophicles offers a unique, gonzo form of self-examination we could all benefit from.

Here are, for instance, his views on Socrates. “He claimed to be a citizen of the world. That is so Socrates. ‘Look at me, I’m a citizen of the world’. He’s such an a***hole.” And on truth. “Truth is, ‘Archimedes’ sister puts out’. I guess that’s more of atruth. I’m gonna have to work on that one.”

Dogs and judo. Judo and dogs. Not since Heston Blumenthal took the reins at the Fat Duck and created tulip and lard casserole (or something similar) have two more disparate concepts been united together - www.dogjudo.co.uk showcases a series of films about two dogs called Rexley and Roy. Both are obsessed with, er, judo. That’s it. But it’s very good.

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